The laundry has filtered in and out of
the washing machine and dryer, the suitcases have migrated to the hallway
to make their way up to the attic, and I have settled right back into
work as if I never left.
My journey home was long and tiring, as
one would expect it to be. I was shuffled from airport to airplane
like a piece of worn out luggage. The airline did not accept cash for
their food service, so I rationed my mixed nuts and candy bar
throughout the six hour flight.
At 34,000 feet, I sat there in seat
13D thinking about how I had no where to go and no one to talk to. I
looked around at the couples and the families that were enjoying
traveling together and remembered how just a week earlier, Pieter and
I had enjoyed a flight together to Slovenia. Bitterness and confusion
built up in my mind as I asked myself “Why me?” for what seemed like the 1000th time this year... and tears began to roll
down my already makeup smeared face. At this point, several hours
into my journey, I just didn't care about what anyone thought of me
anymore. I scrambled to find a way through this emotional pain and
ended up finding comfort in a playlist I named “You Can Do This”
-reassuring myself of just that every time I selected a song to add
to it. When I finally arrived at Dulles airport I was exhausted,
hungry, and relieved.
November has blown in with cold
temperatures and a thick reminder that the holidays are right around
the corner! I am convinced that we will all be sick of Christmas decorations
once December 25th finally comes along. It seems as if
retail and restaurant chains are really rushing it along this year,
or maybe it has always been that way and I am just now noticing.
I,
too, am guilty of rushing time. I find myself wishing I had soaked up
every minute that I had with Pieter during my time there, so I
could hold on to every memory he and I made just a little bit longer. As the season of
thankfulness and joy comes around I do want to express how
overwhelmingly blessed I feel to have two homes where I know that I am surrounded
by people that love me.
I want to encourage you today with the reminder that God knows exactly where you are at this very moment.
You can be anywhere in the world, and He still sees you and knows
you. How humbling is it to know that in this vast and
intricate universe YOU are on His mind and YOU mean the most to Him? I pray that with this knowledge you
will have peace and hope as you press on in life's inevitable
obstacles.
*Stay tuned for an immigration update and a special Christmas greeting in my next blog posts.*
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